Well as promised here is the third and concluding part of my trilogy on romance for this month’s article. We have reviewed both “attraction & connection” of romance so perhaps fittingly in these dark days of February we have “Romance, the Separation”! Yup Laurie, you know just how to pitch it, dark on dark and depressive, but it’s very much part of life, and as a “curious, observer and reporter” of life, (how I was recently and probably accurately described) my views on our life in my poetry will lay it down as such! But Valentine’s Day is soon here, so .. start again?
I willingly subscribe to the poets who have “thoughts that breath and words that burn” as defined by a writer named Gray. NO pun intended, and this is not going to be grey but black, so best hold on tight!
Failed romantic episodes or any love break ups are extremely painful, with at times humiliation, depression, anger and many other descriptive emotions added too! I would hazard a guess that if honest, very few people actually escape this experience, but sufferers deal with it in a multitude of different ways. The old saying “ better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all” may be very true, but is scant comfort when experiencing the heartbreak of a failed love! A poem now from my 3rd book seems appropriate here as the first poem in this article, and the title “Change of Heart” may give a clue where I am going with all this now. Not obviously for the heartbroken or squeamish perhaps, but very true I’m told, and I’m sure will resonate …..
Change of Heart
Carrying a sad and heavy heart
And with all emotions burning,
You have been badly hurt
Your desires just left yearning.
Believing all would work out well
Whilst preparing for a blessing.
But in a heartbeat it was gone
Leaving you upset and guessing,
Why words said to you,
That were loving, warm and nice.
All disappeared in an instant
Turning hot blood into ice.
What could have now happened?
Causing such a massive shock,
To all of those deepest feelings
Making your whole world rock!
Was it something that was said,
Or an opinion now changed?
But you don’t know for sure,
No cross words were exchanged.
So to compound your inner pain
You can only wonder why,
It has fallen all apart?
So now you just want to cry!
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Oh dear, it’s all going wrong, or worse, GONE wrong! That commitment to last a lifetime, special words of undying love and promises sworn on hearts or mothers lives, have now become empty words that echo obscenely in your head and soul. “Separation, over, and finished” are now the words you come to recognise as constant unwanted companions and will haunt your world. Almost poetic, so onto another poem “Loves Departure” again from my second book.
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Loves Departure
Your angel of love has now departed
So you are left here sad and alone,
By the one you hoped you’d die with
Who you placed on your hearts throne.
No more miracle of loves perfection
Will be there to love and walk beside,
As you lurch blindly through the days
You know something deep has died!
And with this death of your feelings
You see the spectre that’s your heart,
Rot like a corpse that lies unburied
And your numb soul is ripped apart.
Limping through the world of sorrow
You hear the life spectators mock,
For you cannot find rhyme or reason
As you stare blankly, still in shock.
Thinking that love was to last forever
Whatever else was to be said or done,
For those promises now echo falsely
So now your nightmare has begun.
You look back at those good times,
And all that you happily sacrificed.
Now washed up as shipwreck waste
That through your heart has sliced.
So now you trudge your tearful journey
Of life, that you must make all alone.
No more those glorious, bright horizons,
Just black shadow and a heart of stone!
–
Yes a failed love can take some getting over and in the case of some people it is often never really resolved and dealt with. Of course with such seismic moving, and depth of emotions, coupled with all types of experiences and intimacy with another human being, perhaps it should never be totally forgotten, as it should really be a main event in a lifetime.
However life is rarely that straightforward and simple, so people will unquestionably react differently and accordingly to how the break up came about. Unpredictable and dangerous ground now, and as I’ve said before, I am an observer and poetic reporter of life so don’t profess to have all, or even many of the answers, only what I see and hear.
Coincidentally again from my second book, (More Poetic Views of Life) comes a “parable like” poem that whilst fictional, it has tentative roots from my many years in forensic psychiatry and mental health, where I got to see most of human nature and its suffering and anguish from various angles. My next poem in this article “Sumo Story”.
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Sumo Story
The gentleman was extremely fat
Nothing else that you could say,
But the most concerning thing
Was that he got bigger every day.
The kids would always taunt him
Wherever he was or tried to go,
And it really hurt and upset him
When they called out, “hey Sumo”!
But he wasn’t always like this
So overweight and out of trim.
In fact he’d been very handsome,
With big muscles, and quite slim.
So we must ask what’s happened
To let himself go such as this?
Well there is much more to it
But it all started with a kiss,
With a girl who took him over,
His heart, his soul, his mind.
In fact he fell for her completely,
But to him she was so unkind.
Our man though, couldn’t see it
He thought she was “the one”,
That he’d love and spend his life with
But he was about to come undone.
She took him for every penny
And also cheated on him too.
When he finally asked her why?
She told him just what he could do!
Having seen her take all his money,
And trample on his self respect.
He just could not cope with it,
And thus began his self neglect.
His only comfort became his food
And he didn’t work out any more.
He just kept on with his eating
Until weighing twenty stone and four.
His friends had tried to help him
But he only retreated with his feast.
And ignored all the pleas of others
Turning into a very angry beast.
Thus the man the kids called Sumo
Has lost everything he once had.
And now the world can’t help him
So he is just lonely, fat and sad.
But our mister Sumo was aware
Of what would likely be his fate,
So he decided that he’d beat it
With a rope that took his weight!
–
Fortunately most breakdowns of love and relationships don’t end so tragically, although I’m quite sure in deepest moments of despair and anguish such extremes are contemplated by many. Yes, the dramatic reversals of emotions felt can be very painful as we have seen above, so before I try to lift us all in conclusion, I will include another short poem from my very first published book in 2014, with a sober message and feeling in it, “Paradox of Life”
Paradox of Life
Loving words and passions sighs
Fall like gifts from heavens skies,
You walk on clouds, feel ten feet high
And talk to angels passing by.
But life will always have a sting
And back to hard earth it will bring,
Brief times that mock to disbelieve
Emotions flattered to deceive.
–
Paradox of Life, short and to the point and with a simple warning perhaps, but as I promised to try to lift the mood in conclusion of this months article I will keep my word. Once again a simple and hopefully positive point.
That simple point is that whilst many people who have had love break ups, divorces and romance reversals carry the metaphoric or internal scars for life, they mostly DO try love again! Some many times and others with multiple marriages, but there goes my poetic observations again, so should you be lucky enough to find happiness in love and romance, please enjoy and indulge those ecstatic feelings…………………….
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All four of my books :–
Poetic Views of Life
More Poetic Views of Life
Reviews of Life in Verse &
Life Scene in Verse,
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