Sorting out truth to reveal reality is a goal of mine. This presents a new basis for living that is a firm foundation upon to which to build a new life. A higher perception appears. The past has no more influence over my old reactions. My vision moves forward from the fearful past into seeing everything as good.
Looking at personal character flaws offers new glasses to see what is really going on and how to become a better person. Realizing that situations were learning experiences through this journey of life, I do not have to judge them as bad. They are necessary to move beyond the experience for energy to shift into a higher vibration of understanding. What is the lesson from this event?
I recently had a deep meaningful occurrence. I was on a road that was not marked that is was a detour from the regular route into town. I drove and drove ending up in another town and needed to return to my city for an errand. It wasted time and gasoline. The trip was to obtain a new disability placard for the car. When I presented the paperwork, I found the doctor had mismarked the information. I would not get the usual two cards, but only one. This would cause a problem because I use one in each car.
As I returned home from this unpredictable event, I was doubled over in physical pain in my stomach. I asked myself where was the pain coming from and went into meditation for answers. I found two answers. I was not in shame for this not falling smoothly together. The painful piece of the puzzle was that I never had a voice in this predicament or in growing up. The lack of a sign to warn me of a detour and the doctor’s mistake were out of my control. My anger came up like a volcano exploding.
In my rageful outburst, the space was cleaned out from the past stuffed feelings and it felt like relief. Realizing that currently I have found my voice in support groups, with friends, and in counseling, I no longer need to stay angry, because I have a say today in my activities. It was time for that buried ire to leave. This meant I was free from its influencing my current decisions and behaviors. I feel a difference within me of being more complete, like some of my soul was healed.
Healing the inner me is the answer. I can no longer pretend who I am. I need to allow all old stuffed feelings to leave from this deeper level. I understand that my consciousness is what people see in me. Am I projecting fearful, angry, shamed, or other feelings? Releasing these old emotions is necessary for growing into the authentic me, created in the love of the universe that are higher frequencies. This is the real shift into maturity. In the Bible, it is explained as building your life on solid ground.
It is not possible to have anger and faith at the same time. I chose to walk in faith and put myself in the arms of love that is my inheritance. A firm foundation creates a new basis for life. Through faith and trust, it is possible to rise above the past. This is often referred to as being born again.
When appropriately addressed it bring maturity. When turning my life over to a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, I feel a new power and direction to continue in my spiritual journey. My new walk in faith moves me from my childish reactions. It is not my job to look for love, but to find the barriers that stop my connection to that higher frequency. I yield to being in a consciousness of inner peace.
Love has always been within my heart. I was afraid to listen and be vulnerable. This is my defining moment, a decision to move beyond past difficulties. When my energy of consciousness rises into a higher awareness, my feet are on solid soil while my eyes see beyond the old problems.
Negative emotions of prior years stopped blessings like a shield in front of me. They had to leave emotionally, to clear the channel for a conscious connection to a higher power. Being in gratitude daily opens my heart to receive my inheritance waiting for me. The wrath that came up had to leave so I could grow beyond the past into living in the “NOW”. It actually was necessary for my growth and to clear out the channel to God.
I need to give up being the manager of my life. For me surrendering for caring guidance and direction from my heart was the most difficult decision and action I have taken. I choose to replace that ego driven life to become an agent of love. This was the turning point in my life. Many call it maturity or Christ Consciousness.
With a new foundation, it is possible to move into forgiveness, compassion, and unconditional love that transports being in the world, but not of it. Fresh feelings of harmony, serenity, and joy fill me. Gratitude for the burdens and tribulations of the past leaving is a relief. The new me is a spiritual being letting go of human burdens and errors as I grow back to my source. Reality is living in the moment. This is a gift and why it is called The Present.
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