Go on have another one. Go ON, it’s Christmas, get it down your neck, Christmas only comes once a year, so make the most of it. Yes it’s that festive time when gluttony and over indulgence becomes the norm for many without too much thought.
It has also become a bit of a regular habit for me to write about this in December as well, probably three of the five Christmas periods I’ve been writing my monthly column, but hey, you can see I’m consistant and regular with my views. Of course times have changed a bit and probably with an increase in binge drinking and perhaps over eating as well, the excesses of Christmas may not be so profound. However for some not so regular heavy drinkers, this lively period can be a temptation that later can be very much regetted.
Booze and Two’s
It is written that alcohol increases desire
But reduces performance too,
This can be proved on most weekends
When the drunkards roll into view.
Inhibitions and balance both fade
The harder they drink and revel,
With love in the air and emotions high
And skirts raised to panties level,
On young ladies mostly so serene
And always shy of the sexy scrum.
But with lots of drink inside them now
They’re more than keen to flash their bum!
Blokes also will feel the effect
As more alcohol lowers their wit.
They think they’re great lovers and Romeo’s
But in truth most are not even fit.
Though that doesn’t stop them at all
Trying to show off all their might,
With them struggling to just stand up
Let alone trying to fight!
Yes alcohol can always take it’s toll
Making a fool out of me and you,
For I’ve never been to bed with an ugly girl
But woken up with quite a few.
*
So maybe a warning in that poem then, with the first lines of verse one suggested by Shakespeare in Macbeth. See, alcohol AND culture here…
Though it is not only alcohol that Christmas tempts us to over indulge on. Food is everywhere, and from the smallest gathering to special meals or parties, sweets, mince pies, crisps and peanuts wave enticingly! With that being the case I have no intention to “preach” but let the poems speak, but lol ok, I did write them.
A Weight On Your Mind
Most people would like to lose weight
Unless you’re as stick thin as a quill,
And my experiences of folk like that
Is that they are nearly always ill.
Or having health and dietary problems
With maybe muscle and joint aches,
Probably caused by over exercise
From the pounding their body takes.
But for the rest of us ordinary people
A few pounds or perhaps a stone,
Would be a joy to actually lose
So that fact is quite well known,
Most likely said by your doctor
On any regular health test.
For although we don’t want to hear,
Losing weight is for the best.
Now I have always been very healthy
And no hospital operations for me.
But whilst I guess some is luck
I have always strived to be,
Fit and active and to use a gym
And keep my body working right.
No cigarettes have passed my lips,
And I sleep well at night.
So we have a conundrum here
When it comes to health and weight,
For it is a complex problem
How to feel and look great.
But perhaps I can dare to offer
Some advice that suits what I do,
To take everything in moderation
And have a contented mind too.
*
Mmmm so some good old fashioned parental advice there, but possibly still very true? In any case I will state that I have always enjoyed Christmas but have believed from my very early years we should at least TRY to be nice, kind and considerate all year round and not just when we are encouraged or told around December. Of course everybody is though aren’t they?
Is it Merry Christmas?
Christmas cheer fills the world
All ready for that special day,
Got to have the greatest meal
For the best ever family day.
Smiling faces beam for the photo
All happy sat round the table.
Well mostly smiling, some just trying,
To look as happy as they’re able!
For Christmas isn’t all it seems
Despite your spending and the drinking,
And peace on earth, goodwill to men
Isn’t really what most are thinking!
It all has to be done, put on a show
Make sure the kids presents are the best,
For when they all return to school
Their parents must pass this test.
Not much cheer in the Christmas crush
Battling each other in the shops,
To get all excesses in good time,
You must pull out all the stops.
Or be deprived of those luxuries
The adverts scream you must buy,
So your greatest day stresses soar
No matter just how hard you try.
For Christmas isn’t all it seems
Despite your spending and the drinking,
And peace on earth, goodwill to men
Isn’t really what most are thinking!
Greed mentality takes over dwellings
Cramming supplies up to the walls,
As if to withstand some long siege
This one day battle is made for fools
Who succumb to the media demands,
And empty their banks and cash flow.
So after the fuss and waste is done
It’s not worth seeing your money go.
But I’m no Scrooge or killjoy at all
I like a booze up too, that I must say,
Though I really can’t help thinking
How nice if it was Christmas every day.
And not the seasons bloating scene
With It’s pushing and shoving crowd,
Who cannot see that just being nice
All long year round is still allowed!
No, as I say in the poem I’m no Scrooge, and love much of the seasonal delights, but without using it as an excuse, and I guess that in some people’s cases for them to be slightly nice for a couple of days is another form of miracle? Come ON, you know them as well…..
Face Up To It
I see your face is lined and drawn
And the skin looks hard and leathered.
The wear comes from the trials of life,
Whilst the exterior has weathered
Many a storm and bright sunshine,
Which has given you a worn tan.
But you were not always thus,
Years back when life began.
For in early days we were fresh
With bodies and faces all sublime,
Until the stress and strains began
As our lives moved on with time.
With worries replacing comfort years
And times youth seemed forever.
Then life’s journey weaves a web
And soon your not so together.
But in those first flushes of youth
We are athletic, fit and strong,
Dealing with most physical needs
Of the world, if it goes wrong.
So make the most of that health
That my dad said made you a king.
For if you are ill or decrepit,
Any money won’t mean a thing.
Thus confront your mirrored image
As it looks aged back at you,
For that is the very way of life
With nothing that you can do.
So best you enjoy the good times
And make them go a long way,
Because ageing process concerns
May not give too many a day.
*
Christmas and life then, so make sure you enjoy it all, but maybe avoiding those proverbial “pot holes” that are not only confined to epidemic proportions on our roads, SO, yes I have to say it, “It’s a rocky road we travel in life”! Happy Christmas, be jolly and beware….
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