Most of my life I was told what to do by my parents, then by my husband, and after that by my principal where I taught school. Never realizing I could have my own ideas and wishes, I was very obedient in a dysfunctional family environment for many years. My intention was not to endure the consequences of not following orders. I was distraught and troubled about life and my part in it. In this setting I was not a happy person, as I was not the real me.
Through a major traumatic life-threatening situation, I prayed for help. This led me to finding a spiritual path where I could claim my life and my own aspirations. Gradually, I reclaimed my life. My book, “Paradigm Busters” at Amazon has my story and how I released the barriers that stopped my life from the opportunities and inheritance that were there for me.
I first learned that fear stops the sunlight of the spirit. Needing to release my fear for a new basis in life was scary. However, as I identified each one to let go, I replaced it with love and grace; my life started to change. The fears of moving forward in my life were overwhelming; however, moving onward was more important. I found the power within to move out of my relationships that were not good for me.
Identifying anger from past harms and abuse called resentments are continuing to this day in my life. Not allowing myself to feel all the identifying past angers and letting them go, I still had old anger intensely inside.
I just had two car accidents in the last 4 months to get my attention and release deeper resentments. Being raised that “Nice girls do not get angry”, I stuffed these feelings very well. I kept my rage inside to comply. Another saying in those times was, “Children are to be seen and not heard”. Over the years, my temper stayed buried.
My mother guilted me to do her wishes, I understand today. My church added to this, calling me a sinner and I caused someone to die. Because of the family dysfunction and added church dogma that also shamed and guilted me, I never brought home my friends from school, as they would see how terrible my life was. I was even ashamed when my mother came to the PTA meeting at school. I acted as if I did not know her as she walked by my jump roping at recess with the other girls. My intentions were not to be hurt or humiliated one more time.
Guilt and shame were the basis for my old life until I found I did not have to be guilty or shameful. Today, I know I am a child of the universe born in love. It is not necessary for me to act out the guilt and shame of my parents. Today, I have removed the unnecessary guilt and shame. Accepting this new insight has been gradual, however, just this week someone tried to shame and guilt me. I noticed it immediately and knew it was their projection onto me.
Old feelings keep me thinking I am unworthy, not good enough, and less than. Knowing we are always doing the right thing at the right time removes the guilt. I am as worthy as everyone as we all come from our Creator. We are all created equal. I can relax and be myself and that is all right.
Since those days, I learned how influential my consciousness could be. Currently, I am able to change my patterns of biology. With “pure intent” which is from the heart, I can affect my body cells. My body can listen to what I say. I can stay alive longer and have better health if I am balanced. My thoughts can affect my immune system as well. Science includes this in their subject matter called epigenetic.
Now, I am able to have a new intention. It is like a spiritual command from the soul essence to the cells of my body. With equilibrium, wisdom, and the smile of knowingness, along with compassionate action, knowing how things work, I can change my intention for health and a happy life. I am able to change the basis of my old feelings to love and forgiveness.
This reevaluation is helping me right now as I am recovering from the air bags exploding in my car accident causing Cellulitis. This information is not a coincidence; when I need the information, it comes to me. I have the ability to create the healthy mental and emotional messages to my cells to heal the inflammation from my injuries from the automobile accident with the help of antibiotics. My needs are met.
This is proof to me that God brings me the information, answers, and awareness with the right timing. When I am aware of what to change, the answer appears. My intention no longer needs to come from survival in a dysfunctional background, but can move into resolving the issue with a new loving intention of health and well-being.
My books are being distributed internationally to prisons and used as a book study in San Quentin. I am included in the prodigious book, “Who’s Who in America. This concept is explained further in my books, You Tubes, readings, and counseling. I am an ordained minister for spiritual counseling, readings, regression, IBRT, and healing, ABH. In addition, I am a teacher, speaker, and medium offering information from the other side for illness, relationships, and issues in your life. I am able to help you find your health, happiness, and prosperity.
Check out her website, https://www.angelicasgifts.com /
Books: at https://www.amazon.com/Marilyn-Redmond/e/B0069WIKDC
Barnes and Nobel https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/Marilyn+Redmond?_requestid=16065424 179 videos on You Tube at https://www.youtube.com/user/puyallup98372
Blog at http://marilynredmondbooks.blogspot.com./